Jeremy Clarkson, the 65-year-old television star known for his time on Top Gear, faces ongoing challenges with a basic household skill despite his success in farming. After acquiring a 1,000-acre property in Oxfordshire, formerly Curdle Hill Farm and now rebranded as the popular Diddly Squat Farm, he documents his agricultural ventures in the Amazon Prime Video series Clarkson’s Farm.

Cooking Challenges with Farm-Fresh Ingredients

Clarkson recently attempted to master the basics of cooking, leveraging the excellent ingredients available right on his doorstep. He started with a béchamel sauce, where his first try succeeded surprisingly well, but the second attempt resulted in a lumpy mess he likened to “an amputated testicle.” Initially blaming the farm’s Aga cooker, he soon acknowledged his own limitations.

Clarkson stated, “Could it be that some people simply can’t cook? I know I can’t do DIY or gardening, and I’d have no clue how to mend an engine, so maybe the dark art of making food hot is just another one of those things that’s beyond me.”

Success in the Professional Kitchen

To test his skills further, Clarkson purchased a rib of beef from a local butcher and used the professional kitchen at The Farmer’s Dog pub, which he opened in 2024. Cooking it in a £20,000 Rational oven produced a perfect result. He joked that all he needed was a “foolproof oven.”

Building confidence, he prepared pho with star anise, bruschetta, and a pork and black pepper dish. However, Chinese cuisine remains elusive. Clarkson explained, “But I do struggle whenever I try to make something Chinese. I watch the recipes on TikTok and buy high-quality oyster and soy sauces. I even have an expensive wok, but whenever I try to stir-fry slivers of beef, they always come out of the pan looking like burnt matches.”

He humorously noted difficulty finding lessons in the Cotswolds, calling the area “famously racist.”

Positive Developments at The Farmer’s Dog

Clarkson received approval for using a neighboring field as an overflow car park for his pub. West Oxfordshire District Council granted temporary permission, while Historic England praised his engagement on the matter. The heritage body commented, “Having previously engaged in discussions about the car park and the barrow, we are pleased to see that an application has now been submitted. This is a positive step in finalising discussions around parking for the pub.”