Rupert Everett Reflects on a Life of Excess and Transformation

Actor Rupert Everett, known for his roles in Another Country and My Best Friend’s Wedding, has lived a life as dramatic and unconventional as any he’s portrayed on screen. Now, at 67, the outspoken star is looking back on his younger years, marked by a hedonistic lifestyle, and reflecting on his late-life transformation.

A Star is Born Amidst Tumultuous Youth

Everett burst onto the acting scene in 1984, gaining wider recognition in the late 1990s. However, his public persona was often overshadowed by a reputation for a wild and self-indulgent existence. This period included documented experiments with heroin and sex work, as well as a highly publicized affair with television presenter Paula Yates during her marriage to Bob Geldof.

“My wild days of sex and drugs and being mates with Madonna are over,” Everett stated in a recent interview. He claims to be “less selfish” now, having seemingly put his more tumultuous past behind him.

Early Days: Rebellion and Risk

Leaving a privileged boarding school at 16, Everett soon found himself in London, embracing a life of experimentation. He previously shared a desire to “smoke cigarettes, suffer and finish off as badly as possible,” aiming to become a “raw movie icon” who would “die young like James Dean.”

To support himself, Everett reportedly engaged in sex work, describing how he “sort of fell into” it after being approached with a significant sum of money. His parents, concerned about his direction, sent him to live with a family in France to learn the language and perhaps find stability.

During his time in France, Everett found himself drawn to a different world, living temporarily with a transsexual sex worker he met. He also candidly admitted to using heroin during this period, stating, “I moved into some things – just anything that was the opposite to my upper-middle-class kind of classical English upbringing. I took drugs – all the Hoorays took heroin – and adored sex.”

Career Milestones and Public Feuds

Everett’s breakthrough came at 22 with his role in Another Country, playing the lover of Colin Firth’s character. This early success propelled him into Hollywood, leading to roles in films like Dance With a Stranger and cementing his status as Julia Roberts’ on-screen best friend in My Best Friend’s Wedding.

His time performing in Noel Coward’s play The Vortex, which tackled themes of drug abuse, led to an unusual response to a complaint from a couple: Everett reportedly sent them a cutting of his pubic hair.

A notable aspect of his career was a two-decade-long feud with Another Country co-star Colin Firth. Everett publicly criticized Firth as “boring,” while Firth reportedly described Everett as a “monster.” The animosity eventually subsided after they worked together on The Importance of Being Earnest in 2002.

Memoirs and Revelations

Everett’s candid memoirs, Red Carpets and Other Banana Skins (2006) and Vanished Years (2012), offered unflinching accounts of his life, sparing few. He made sharp observations about public figures, including Alistair Campbell and Alan Sugar.

The memoirs also detailed personal struggles, including his reaction to a former boyfriend’s HIV diagnosis, admitting he walked away due to his inability to cope. He reflected on the pervasive fear surrounding the AIDS pandemic, recounting how gay individuals were treated with suspicion, even by loved ones.

Everett also spoke about his experiences with gay cruising on Hampstead Heath, describing it as an almost dreamlike, albeit dark, environment. “Hampstead Heath was like being in A Midsummer Night’s Dream,” he recalled.

Relationships and Romances

Despite identifying as gay, Everett maintained relationships with several prominent women, including actresses Susan Sarandon and Beatrice Dalle, and a six-year relationship with Paula Yates. He described his relationship with Yates, who was married to Bob Geldof, as an “utter misfits” love affair, noting the unique dynamic of their unconventional connection.

His observations about Madonna and Julia Roberts in his memoir, suggesting they smelled “vaguely of sweat” and describing Roberts as “beautiful and tinged with madness,” led to a period of estrangement from Roberts and a strained relationship with Madonna, who felt her privacy had been infringed upon. While there was a period of distance, Everett later stated they had reconciled and remained friends.

A Shift Towards Domesticity

For years, Everett expressed skepticism about marriage, particularly gay marriage, calling it a “waste of time.” However, his perspective shifted after meeting Brazilian accountant Henrique. The couple married in 2024.

Having relocated to Wiltshire in 2018, Everett now describes his life as that of a “country blob.” He spends his days walking his dog and writing, feeling a deep connection to his late parents. This domestic life is a stark contrast to the globe-trotting, hedonistic existence he pursued for much of his adult life.

Reflecting on his past relationships, Everett admitted to being “slippery” and often seeking new experiences, stating, “I just wanted to have more relationships.” He acknowledged a tendency to “pretend to feel the right things when you weren’t” and a constant drive to move on to the “next thing.”

The actor’s current lifestyle, one he once sought to escape in his youth, now represents a profound personal transformation and a newfound sense of contentment.