Missé Beqiri, the former partner of The Only Way Is Essex personality Jake Hall, has shared her profound grief and the harrowing experience of learning about his sudden death. Hall, 35, tragically passed away last month following an accident involving a glass door at a villa in Mallorca, Spain, after a night out. The news sent shockwaves through the entertainment world, prompting numerous tributes from celebrity friends.

For Beqiri, a Swedish-Albanian model and star of Bravo’s Ladies Of London: The New Reign, the news was particularly devastating. She shares an eight-year-old daughter, River, with Hall, with whom she had an on-again, off-again relationship for five years. In her first public statement since his passing, Beqiri described the moment she received the call from Hall’s family.

The ‘Worst Phone Call’

“Even today, I keep thinking: ‘Is this really happening?’,” Beqiri recounted. “Getting that call from his family to let me know, I remember that I kept saying: ‘There’s no way,’ and then everything went black. I can’t remember any of it. I didn’t want to believe it.” The immediate aftermath was a blur of disbelief and overwhelming shock. “I was crying on the phone to my mom, who was saying: ‘This can’t be true.’ The shock was awful.”

Her primary concern, however, was her daughter, River. “The first person I thought about was River. How can I tell her that her dad is gone? I kept thinking: ‘I don’t know if I am able to do this.’ That was the worst phone call I’ve ever had in my life.”

At the time of Hall’s death, River was staying with his parents, Greg and Jaqueline, in the UK. Hall himself was in Santa Margalida, Mallorca, spending time with friends at a rented villa and reportedly focusing on his art.

A Bizarre Coincidence

Adding a layer of surreal tragedy, Beqiri discovered she was also in Spain at the time of Hall’s accident. “What was most bizarre about it was that I was also in Spain when it happened,” she explained. “I have never lost my passport in my life. I was flying back from working in Ibiza, and I got to the airport, and my passport was gone. To get an emergency one, you have to go to Mallorca. So I was in Mallorca the day he died, and I didn’t realise. I got the call while I was there sorting it out, and I flew straight home in a blur.”

Regarding the specifics of the accident, Beqiri stated she has limited information. “I don’t know any more about what happened that night,” she said. “I know as much as everyone else knows. All we know is what we know from the police report – that it was a terrible accident.”

Breaking the News to River

Beqiri, who also has an 11-year-old son, Julian, from her previous marriage to Danish footballer Anders Lindegaard, described the heartbreaking moment she had to inform River of her father’s death. “It was the worst thing I’ve ever had to do,” she said, her voice filled with emotion. “It didn’t feel like it was real for me to have to tell my child that her dad had passed.”

River’s reaction was, understandably, one of deep sadness. “She was really upset, of course. We’re trying to keep her in her routine, but when I took her back to school, she said: ‘Do people know I don’t have a dad now?’ It’s so much for her little brain to process.”

To help River cope, she is receiving therapy and is surrounded by a strong support system, including both families and friends. Her older brother, Julian, also provides significant comfort due to their close bond, despite living in Denmark.

Beqiri admitted to overthinking her decisions, including a recent social media post of her children. “I don’t tend to show my kids on social media, but I posted a picture of them the other day because people were asking if she was OK, and I felt I owed it to them to let her see how she was doing. But then I worried that was the wrong thing to do. I’m overthinking everything.”

A History of Profound Loss

This is not the first time Beqiri has experienced such profound grief. In December 2019, her older brother, Flamur “Alex” Beqiri, was fatally shot on his doorstep in Battersea, London. The 36-year-old’s murder was linked to a gangland feud, and the perpetrator is serving a life sentence.

“Losing my brother, I had to learn how to deal with grief,” she explained. “It was six years ago, but it still feels like a month ago. It was sudden, too. When I lost him, I thought: ‘I will never feel pain like this again,’ then losing Jake, it was like: ‘How is this happening to me again?’”

Finding Strength in Motherhood

In the difficult weeks following Jake Hall’s death, Beqiri found the strength to continue largely due to her children. “I had to be strong. There’s been moments where I was like: ‘I mentally cannot take another thing.’ And then I look at my kids and I think: ‘Yes, you can, because they need you.’ My children really helped me to navigate the grief.”

She acknowledged the severity of her emotional state, noting, “I could have easily ended up in a mental health retreat – I’ve been twice in the last five years. I’m not sleeping well.” The loss of Hall’s constant presence, even post-relationship, has been particularly jarring. “Jake and I might not have been together, but I always knew he was there if I needed him. I spoke to him all the time because of River. We would be in touch most days. So for me to not have that now, it feels scary to be alone.”

Impact on Her Daughter’s Future

Beqiri fears that Hall’s death will profoundly alter River’s life trajectory, much like her brother’s passing reshaped her own. “You can have someone next to you, but tomorrow they could be gone. That’s how I felt when my brother died, because he was my safety. He was older, and if there was anything I needed, he would help me. When I lost him, something in me changed and my life has never been the same. And now, losing Jake, that’s how it will be for River.”

She expressed deep concern for River’s future milestones. “I keep thinking: ‘How is my daughter going to grow up without her dad?’ She won’t have him on her wedding day or when she finishes school or does an exam. There are these big life moments where you need your dad and she won’t have that.”

Therapy and Coping Mechanisms

Beqiri credits her ongoing therapy for helping her process her grief and manage complex emotions. “Some days I want to shout: ‘You f***ing c***, why did you leave? Why did you do this?’ And then I look at pictures of him and I think: ‘Oh god, I love you – please come home.’ But speaking to a therapist for two hours kind of balances me out.”

Remembering Jake Hall

The interview took place shortly before Hall’s funeral, which was attended by numerous celebrities and former co-stars. Beqiri met Hall in 2016 in Manchester. At the time, he was a cast member on The Only Way Is Essex, and she was appearing on The Real Housewives Of Cheshire. She had recently ended a relationship with Anders Lindegaard. Beqiri recalled their initial connection as exciting and intense.

“He was so fun,” she remembered, touching a tattoo of a “J” on her wrist, a matching tribute to Hall’s “M” tattoo. “He had this star aura. People liked being around him. Everything was exciting with him.” Their relationship progressed quickly, leading to pregnancy within a year. “It was this very quick and intense love.”

Despite a period of on-and-off dating and a brief engagement in 2018, the couple separated in 2021. “We loved each other, but our relationship was done by the end. It was a sickly obsession that turned toxic, but we always cared for each other.” Beqiri emphasized Hall’s deep love for River, stating, “I know he would never want to leave her. And he will live on in her. She will always have his family. I want Jake to be remembered as an amazing dad, creative and fun. When I think of him, I see him dancing and smiling with his big mouth.”

Moving Forward

Looking ahead, Beqiri faces a daunting future but is determined to live life to the fullest in Hall’s memory. She has returned to work, including a modeling shoot, and hopes for a second season of Ladies Of London: The New Reign. She acknowledges potential judgment for returning to work quickly but sees it as essential for herself and as a role model for River.

“What’s right? I have to work, I want River to see Mommy working. It helps me. Honestly, when I went to the shoot for the first job I had [after Jake’s death], I was like: ‘OK, I feel proud.’ I’m doing this for her.”

Beqiri understands that grief is a personal journey. “There’s no right way to grieve. I remember someone telling me it’s like constantly having a stone in your pocket. It changes and evolves, but it is always there and you can always feel it.” She advocates for self-compassion during the grieving process, stating, “You have to allow yourself to be like: ‘OK, I can’t get up today and I’m going to stay in bed for two days.’ Or, if you want to go and get hammered one day, that’s fine.”

Ultimately, Beqiri is focused on finding purpose and positivity. “I love working and I am a single woman with responsibilities. There has been so much darkness for me that I’ve got to look on the bright side. I need to be positive. I want to find purpose. I don’t believe Jake would want me to sit at home. He’d say: ‘Get the f**k up!’ He always used to say that to me. He was a pusher. He never even let me have a nap. He always wanted more for me. I know if there’s one thing he would want me to do, it’s to keep going – so that’s what I have to do.”

Key Takeaways

• Missé Beqiri received the devastating news of ex-partner Jake Hall’s death via a phone call from his family.
• She described the call as the “worst phone call of my life” and struggled with disbelief and shock.
• Beqiri’s immediate concern was how to break the news to their eight-year-old daughter, River.
• A bizarre coincidence placed Beqiri in Mallorca, the same location as Hall’s fatal accident, at the time of his death.
• She shared the heartbreaking moment she told River, who asked if people now knew she didn’t have a dad.
• Beqiri has a history of profound grief, having lost her brother to murder in 2019.
• She finds strength in her children and relies on therapy to cope with her emotions.
• Beqiri aims to honor Hall by living life to the fullest and continuing her work.

Frequently Asked Questions

How did Jake Hall die?

Jake Hall died as a result of a tragic accident involving a glass door at a villa in Mallorca, Spain, following a night out.

Who is Missé Beqiri?

Missé Beqiri is a Swedish-Albanian model and television personality, known for her role in Bravo’s Ladies Of London: The New Reign. She is the former partner of Jake Hall and mother to their daughter, River.

How is River coping with her father’s death?

River is receiving therapy and is supported by her family. Beqiri is focused on maintaining her daughter’s routine and helping her process the significant loss.